Even worse.

Brandon just informed me that the Sick Bear cups were even considered the “Best Children’s Products” by Orca Communications (what does an orca have to do with anything?):

It’s no fun to throw up all over the bed, car or carpeting! The Sick Bear provides security and comfort.

But is it even fun to throw up in a giant plastic cup? NO. The only security and comfort a vomiting child needs is a nice toilet bowl that will flush the gross puke away. And a toothbrush.  With lots of tooth paste.

Better yet,

Be prepared. No child should ever have to hug a toilet.

Let me say this. It’s a hard, cruel and cold world out there. Kids these days are way too spoiled. I say, let them experience reality as early as they can! No cuddles! No baby voices! No soft, processed food for their toothless gums, cause one day, they’re going to have to CHEW their food down, just like one day they’ll realize they’re alone on this sad, mean planet and Mommy’s not going to be there to hug it away.

And NO STUPID BOWLS FOR VOMITING. If they’re going to spend their high school (or college, like me. NOT.) weekends throwing up their alcohol poisoning, let them develop their puke skills early on.

Just like teaching boys to not urinate on the toilet seat, right? Right.