NYC Prep For Fugs
June 8, 2009
Alright. Now I know why I like California so much. People here are much prettier.
How so? I finally caught up with the preview episode of Bravo’s NYC Prep, which I know is supposed to be the reality version of Gossip Girl, but seriously, who did the casting for this show? Did they visit the short bus first? These kids (aside from one girl) are hideous. HIDEOUS.
Alright, I’m being mean but look at them. LOOK AT THEM. The third girl form the left? Her head never fully recovered from passing through her mom’s uterus. And the second girl from the right? I think she was supposed to be a boy. And her face is smaller than her head (does that make sense)? See, this is why the rich stay rich: cause they all marry each other and create inbred looking kids like this. It’s the 21st century version of Deliverance, set in the Upper East Side.
Am I a horrible person for saying this? No, because their behavior on the show is just atrocious. They think they’re hot shit with all their money and fake IDs when they’re clearly not. They say love makes you blind, but I think the black AMEX makes you see even worse.
So how come the girls and guys on Laguna Beach and The Hills were so much prettier? I mean, the shows are based on the same situation: privileged high school classmates. And they were so pretty. Kristin Cavallari is just as bitchy as that ginger haired girl with the wonky eyes, but at least she doesn’t make your stomach churn. Maybe because we’re just naturally better looking on this coast. Yeah, that’s it.
Los Angeles: 1 New York: -500,000
After reading this, I was actually a little shocked at how harsh it was. But then I googled NYC prep and looked at them…
First of all, if they have so much money, then why do they dress the way that they do? Seriously–some of the girls dress like an uptight mother and a boarding school girl put in a blender and topped with her great great grandmothers priceless pearls (which, by the way, are the only part of the outfit that are acceptable). If they have so much money, then they should:
1. Hire a stylist at Barney’s New York
2. Read Instyle magazine
3. Watch gossip girl
I admit, I am an avid watcher of Gossip Girl. But even that show has more substance then this show. Instead of “omg a guest brought a guest!” it’s “omg my boyfriend turned husband while escaping to Spain is now a part of a panzi scam.” Just a little more interesting if you ask me… So unless somehow these teens were involved in the Madoff panzi scheme, I won’t be tuning in.
Overall, I think these tweens need to take a hint from Gossip Girl, or just quit: no one wants to watch spoiled rotten brats fight over a seat at fashion week in ugly clothes anyway.